Those Photo IDs

It never bodes well for me when it’s time to get those dreaded ID photos. Driver’s license photos are usually a nightmare. No matter how careful I am making sure my hair is neat, presentable and flattering–the photo usually turns out to be so grim that the only thing missing is the convicted felon number across my chest.

Okay–maybe it’s not that bad.  I’ve often wondered how anyone can take so many terrible photos and I’ve come to this conclusion. First, we have to look straight ahead. No one ever looks straight ahead—even the most reluctant, camera-shy family member knows not to look straight ahead.  We all have a favourite angle or view that we automatically turn to—you know, that slight tilt of the head, that come-hither smile, that twinkle-in-the-eye look. Photo IDs don’t allow this–look-straight-ahead-and-do-not-smile only.

AND did I forget to mention the footprints? At both places, I had to place my feet on these footprints and then look ahead at the camera. Most times, this would be a simple procedure, but when I had to take off my glasses to avoid any camera glare, it is no longer a simple process. To summarize, my feet got shifted out of place, the glasses were half off and the camera snapped the photo. It caught a perfect aerial view of the top of my head.

My passport photo ID is now good for 10 years. The only positive thing I can say about that photo is that 99% of the time, I will be arriving at my destination after a gazillion hours on a plane, so a worn-out, jet-lagged appearance will exactly match my passport photo. But, there is no excuse for my driver license photo, since I have to flash it often for ID purposes. That wild-woman-chased-by-a-psychotic-maniac look was actually caused by a windy day and no doubt, that grim face was a result of seeing the finished photo I’m stuck with for the next 5 years.

 

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