HUGS

My enormous Webster dictionary defines a hug as “to put the arms around and hold closely; to embrace tightly and affectionately.” That was the first of Webster’s four definitions. It all sounds very clinical and seems like a detailed scientific observation. My version? To be up close and personal,  sharing a very warm embrace in the arms of someone you care about and love.

Hugs are personal. It takes a special person to break down my barriers and venture into my private space. As you may have guessed, I’m not a spontaneously huggy person, especially when the Holiday Season rolls around and the hugger-muggers are in their full, sneaky mode. The hugger-muggers’ version of a hug is more of a boozy grab-and-squash rather than a nice, warm embrace that says “I’ve missed you–welcome back.”

I’ve ranked hugs in 5 categories, from the bottom of the list to the top. Number 5 is the boozy grab-and-squash. Now that I’m older and less agile, I thought I was safe from these but when the alcohol fuels the brain and clouds the vision, anyone under the age of 99 is fair game. I’m older and wiser now so I avoid these socials like the plague since that’s where the known grabbers hang out.

Number 4 is a grabber with finesse. He/she will be charming and chatty, when suddenly he/she will declare, “You’re so cute I just want to hug you to bits,” and before you can say, “I know my martial arts,”–you’re grabbed and squashed, but unlike #5, you’ll have a 2-second warning.

Number 3 is a puzzler. He/she will appear shy and quiet so that you feel obligated to chat with them. After all, who hasn’t been to a social function where the only person you know is somewhere in the crowd or making a late entrance and you’re grateful to have someone chatting with you. Sometimes, I find real gems as that particular person would have a fantastic background by being current in political events, music, arts and books besides being a veritable who’s-who of people in the crowd. On parting, he/she gently holds your hands and lightly air-hugs. In case you’re unfamiliar, this is like an air-kiss except it’s a hug that makes no contact, but is almost a hug.

Number 2 is a hugger by nature. He is like everyone’s “big brother.”  He will give you the same exuberant hug he gives his football buddies, his golfing buddies, his college buddies and anyone else he works and plays closely with. I’ve only encountered this in two of my male friend,, but I think it’s a compliment that they feel comfortable knowing that I will return their hug with an enthusiastic sisterly one. As for any consequences, my real big brother and these two taught me my defensive moves. . . .

Number 1 is the cream-de-la-crème of all hugs. This one is the up-close and personal hug that is caring and gentle and says “I love you” even if you’ve only been away for an hour. My Hubby gives the best hugs and he passes it on to my Mom and I. All his love is contained in his hugs and he doesn’t have to say a word because we know. Anyone who knows a #1 hugger is really, really fortunate–these huggers are rare and are definite keepers. They are caring and loving.

Scientists have done extensive research on hugs and have concluded that hugs help lower elevated blood pressures. Just think, eating dark chocolates lowers the blood pressure and now hugs do too. I may be as round as a jelly doughnut, but my blood pressure is great. . . and so is my Hubby’s.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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8 thoughts on “HUGS

  1. I don’t mind hugging nor being hugged–close friends and family. Someone else’s husband or boyfriend has been uncomfortable a time too many.
    Great post. As I mature, I have a short list of people I don’t want near me. Just thought of that after reading your post. I wonder if it’s age? o_O

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    1. You’re right on target, Eva–it’s really important to be hugged the right way and by the right person. Hugger-muggers better know I’m current in my “martial art” moves!

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  2. This has to be my favourite of your blogs so far! Like you, I like to be a good hug – or nothing. I am a fan of handshakes. I don’t much like being hugged just for the sake of it, or by people I don’t know very well. The same applies to kisses.
    By the way, you might be amused by my take on the subject – I wrote this several years ago: https://scribedoll.wordpress.com/2011/09/04/odds-ends-kisses-handshakes-and-hugs/

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    1. I love this past post–it’s brilliant, Katia! And I especially like your Belgian chocolate with pralines.. . 🙂 Thank you for you kind words and lovely to hear from you. . .

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