photo by The Pie Shops Collection

My objective was to make my bathing suit shopping experience as painless as possible. The environment would be key. I needed a store that was calm with wide open aisles, soft music, helpful salespeople. Crawling under a disheveled clothing rack, searching for the elusive bottom to the perfect top, or wrenching it from the clutches of a woman who believed it was hers, would not work. Been there, done that.

So at 9:05am Monday morning I coaxed myself through the doors of Lord & Taylor.

There wasn’t a soul in the swimwear department. I glided around the circular racks like an adolescent guppy until I was sure I had seen all the offerings. It was so civilized. This kind of bathing suit shopping was a joy. I could do this! I let out a heavy sigh–breath I didn’t realize I was holding. I…